I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize
