oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
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