you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
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