I think scott just propositioned me for sex
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
We are two peas in an std pod
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
I like how I get messages from eharmony at the same time I'm looking for a new vibrator. It's like the powers that be are just trying to make my life ironic.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
Randomize
