3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize