you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
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