this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Why can't burritos get me drunk
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
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