Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
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