wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Randomize
