what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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