I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
