ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
Randomize
