So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
Dick very happy bro
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
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