Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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