He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
Randomize
