I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
I woke up under a house in Key West
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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