I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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