their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
You’re a genius! I just walked in, shut the door, blew him and left. He could barely move afterwards and was a hot mess at the presentation. He already sent me a calendar invite for another meeting
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