I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize
