Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
