that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
