Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
Randomize
