OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
