need another drink. this is the easiest way
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Randomize
