Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize