i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
check it out our google latitudes are spooning
Eric just called. Says he's trapped in a cul de sac because the road disappeared. Wants me to tell him what street has the bushes that whisper sweet nothings into you ear and the wobbling purple pokemon. Oh, and a "bigger and better" penis is growing out of his belly button. He took shrooms by the way.
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
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