Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
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