I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
