Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
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