She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
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