exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
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