so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
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