Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
I'm having to shit out rocks
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