I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
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