I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
Randomize
