so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
Randomize
