we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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