They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Randomize
