That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
Randomize
