we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Randomize
