I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
Small penises have feelings too.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize