Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
Randomize
