no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
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