If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Randomize
