I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
I feel great
I just peed on a car
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
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