i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
Randomize
