Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
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