Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
