you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
Randomize
