I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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