just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
I wish life had little blips of pornography
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
Randomize
