Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
Boobs are out for the taking
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
Randomize
