oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
