Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
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