I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
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